Monday, July 27, 2009

Booth Babes--The true sign of a developed nation

It comes as no surprise to me or my pet hamster that females in what some might call stripper outfits are, with possibly the exception of free pizza and/or beer, are wonderful and powerful way to sell a product, whether it's a replica Ryuken Katana from the late Hirohito period or... a video game!

"Booth babes," as they've come to be known, are merely the latest manifestation of an ancient tradition dating back many a millennium (blogspot just taught me that millenia is not a word--who knew? Anyway) to the day Ugh traded Sny to Fft for twenty Psa. Sny, an alluring young woman with the least hairy armpits this side of Qr, was so tantalizing to Fft that he was willing to give up all the food he had foraged for during the autumn harvest. Needless to say, Fft died that winter but not before having the most mind blowing love making sessions our primitive ancestors probably had ever seen. So in the end who was the winner? Fft by a longshot, as Ugh was stuck with hagged and old Rut, practically in the grave at the age of 27. He did get to live a long time thanks to the Psa, but I think we all know who the real winner of that deal was.

My point is, women sell stuff, and it's unfortunate that so many countries have yet to realize this. Look at Saudi Arabia--it's not so hot when you get the model's hands chopped off for accidentally glancing in her eyes when she's try to sell you on 1002 Arabian Nights, the sequel, and her Boshiya accidentally slips. Not to mention the embarrassment of a Boshiya slip, my God.

But China, China has totally got it and is totally if not tacitly fine with it. Not just the standard chick selling cars at international auto shows by metaphorically stroking your newly purchased manhood fine with it, but even video game fine with it. Why is there a difference? Because car drivers are mostly successful men, whereas gamers, especially in China, are scrawny or bulbous teenagers with a serious overload of hormones that have caused countless JIMP moments. So when you add booth babes to the mix, you might as well be lighting a stick of dynamite in a vat of nitro glycerin!

ChinaJoy, China's E3 equivalent, is a testament to China's commitment to opening its economic doors, with booth babes galore, many of which are truly attractive. Combined with China's growing cosplay love, these women--sorry, babes--are a sales and marketing force to be reckoned with, especially as China expands its gaming markets internationally to include the old, white, sweaty and hirsute old lonely men demographic, where it has already shown tremendous potential.

Honestly though, any country that doesn't prevent its women from using their sex appeal to sell shit, it's gotta be on the right track economically. I could blather on, but you'd probably rather just enjoy browsing the babes of booths at ChinaJoy 2009:

(Photo Credit: Frank Yu)

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